Three audio pundits

Fellas, I'm going tell you a made up story today. This is a conversation between Tai Lan Wor, Mud Dou Shek and Sin Kar Lan. They are thereafter refer as Tai, Mud and Sin. Each of them represents respective audio character that we come to know. Below is the conversation over a tea session.

Tai "Gong Xi Fat Choy."
Mud "Gong Xi Fat Choy."
Here comes the controversial audio celeb.
Sin "No, no, no, it should be Gong Xi Liang Shiang to the audio people. May everyday good sound."
Tai "Hey rock star! What is cooking?"
Sin "What is the biggest problem behind an under performing system?"
Mud "Undoubtedly, human problems." 
Tai "What do you really mean?"
Sin "Wait, wait, wait, come tell."
Tai "People don't hear what others hear?"
Mud "People don't make an effort to learn how to get good sound. Like nobody read instruction menu. I hate to bring this to you. You need to spend to get tonal quality, buddies. Some qualities not common in budget audio. Tonal color is avail to all levels of audio."
Tai "Spending money to get out of problems. I like that."
Sin "That's a rich man solution/problem depends how you look at it."
Mud "That's kind of problem I'd sure like to have. I don't mind having a lot of problems."
Sin "Identify the problems, deal with them. That's important."
Mud "This is wisdom, rejoice my friends!"
Tai " I dreamt of seeing my sifu yesterday."
Mud "Two sifus are better than one sifu, three is better than two. The more the merrier."
Sin "A sifu can potentially bring you to Holland. Nobody admits to having pseudo sifu."
Tai "I know that, it is a shui (jinx) to have followed the wrong sifu. Shui."
Tai "How to choose a good sifu?"
Mud "Don't look at me, you've accused following me to Holland, came back and go back again. Via AirAsia X, buy travelling insurance, we'll have you covered, thank you."
Sin "Does your system prowess backs your mouth? You must be responsible for your words."
Tai "Exactly. I know that stare. So, what is good sound?"
Sin "What is the difference between good sound and right sound?"
Tai "Now, I'm confused."   
Mud "Good sound is only good to their ears."
Tai "Eye fi, the eyes hear. Dare you?"
Sin "Good sound depends who's saying it."
Tai "So, you say good sound is very subjective? Personal flavor to the maximum?"
Mud "Audio is always subjective. As long as you like it."
Sin "What's the rants about? Don't fight the tide. There's a reason for mainstream. Good things never come cheap."
Mud "Because audio is unquantifiable."
Sin "No, no, no, it is a human problem."
Tai "Hmmm......What is right sound then?"
Mud "Right sound sounded right. kek kek kek......."
Tai "This kind of answer, aunties in the market also can give. Aunties are happy listen to radio."
Sin "Absolutely. Your question is not a question, your answer is not an answer."

Mud "Do you know the parable of aborigine and outer space?"
Sin "Just like high end people, they don't have common ground with low end people. People are pursuing a fulfilment, low end folks worry about cost of living, children to  feed."
Tai "I admire those unsung heroes who do not subserve to high end audio, but sticking to their own guns to rightful sound. You know, hearing to determine the good and not so good. What is the major reason for not sound right?"
Mud "They got their priorities wrong, that's why. Anyway, good chances that high end audio will get closer to real things."
Sin "Can I trust you? Is your advice usable? They should first learn what is right sound."
Tai "Teach, teach, teach, this is interesting. You are high end chauvinist."
Mud "How do you describe your sound?"
Sin "Better than last time."
Mud "Hey!!! Be a man, don't avoid."
Sin "How bout yours? Go eat your cha guo."
Mud "Hehehe.... guaranteed good durian seed, no worries."
Tai "Is there anti booming ritual for new room?"
Sin "Superstitious. You know, some guys are born with plenty of luck. He does not have to do a lot to get good sound."
Tai "Do you have luck?"
Sin "A problem is not a problem if money could resolve it. Money always talks."
Tai "Unfortunately not. It has always been a bumpy ride."
Tai "What do you think about shen gong?"
Mud "Can shen gong really work? Shen gong is snake oil shit."
Sin "Of course, it works. It shows my seriousness."
Tai "Like that also can?"
Mud "Fool, if the electronic is good in the first place, it will sounds good. If not, it will not sound good, no matter what you do."
Tai "Shen gong is all about the mind game?"
Mud "Because your system still sing after you have removed them."
Tai "Absolutely uncalled for?"
Mud "High end systems do not need your advice, nor shen gong. Because the engineers work it out."
Sin "That's because you two infidels who suffer brain damage. You can't pick up those improvements."
Tai "Changes, pluses here and minuses somewhere, not improvements?"
Sin "Let's talk about resonance, do you really think you can remove resonance totally? Some companies craft an aluminium block out for component chassis, is that overkilling?"
Tai "The supply will not stop when the demand stops, the fundamental of supply and demand mechanism."
Mud "Resonance control is important, smart ass."
Sin "Little resonance is better than great resonance, no resonance is better than little resonance. Hehehe."
Tai "Now, that's dog wisdom. Go talk to your dog."
Mud "Rich is better than poor, poor is better than poorer. Everybody knows your mother is a woman."
Tai "What is audio zombie all about?"
Sin "Those who have been declared technically dead. Those dated systems in the past five years."
Mud "Stubborn? Inability to accept new ideas?"
Sin "Sort of, are you one? Audio has marked a profound improvement in the last ten year. You wouldn't dream of today's transparency in last ten years."
Tai "I agreed. Nobody confesses himself as audio zombie."
Sin "Who are you to agree? Your system is not big enough to agree. Audio zombie is inducted by the underworld audio communities."
Tai "Sorry, I follow. What do you rather have, big amp or big speaker."
Sin "Big speaker, of course, the bigger the better."
Tai "Why?"
Mud "To be inducted into audio elite group, to be somebody."
Sin "Which kitten system people talk about?"
Mud "Audioing? Kar ki kong kar ki song."
Tai "Absolutely. Sin, he your brother ar? Sometimes, I feel that he is quite sin."
Sin "He is an outcast now."
Tai "You can also buy a lot of big nasty pro sound speakers at Jalan Pasar."
Sin "Speakers? More like boom box."
Mud "This is how our forefathers play. Puny amp, big nasty horn speaker."
Sin "No offence? Horn is ugly."
Mud "Modern horn is different, less colored."
Sin "Jalan Pasar boom box, big and heavy. The sun will rise from the west if you get good sound from them."
Tai "You know, audiophiles are ill minded. They like to see people stumble and play God."
Mud "You're walking right into a land mine. You haven't been to that level as yet."
Sin "Especially with your DIY system, what are these? You call that high fidelity?An assemble of jello."
Tai "Hmmmmmmmmmmm, do you know what is value?"
Mud "Value is for people worry about daily bread. You'll be eaten alive if you keep condemning high end. You better not stick your nose in to high end audio business. Hide in your man cave, play your system, your life will be spared."
Sin "Absolutely no comparo, their cable alone costs more than your whole system. Go fart somewhere else, boy scout."
Tai "My DIY system has the highest cost performance ratio, why spend more?"
Sin "Go make money first, buy high end then talk."
Tai "Sigh! Do you know anyone can help me do speaker positioning? My system sounds not quite right."
Mud "There is a thing I don't quite understand about speaker positioning? Do you truly believe you can position speakers out of your problems?"
Tai "Possible."
Sin "Ahem! I know there are only two guys in Malaysia can do it. These guys have super natural talent."
Tai "How would it differs?"
Sin "One makes your sound like coming out from a box, the other makes your speakers disappear."
Mud "David Copperfield, master of illusion?"
Sin "I'd like to engage him to make my wife disappear. Can't stand the nagging, nag, nag, nag the whole day. Studies show women speak twice than men."
Tai "I'd claim against him for making my expensive DIY speakers disappear?"

Phone rings, "Where is hell are you? Do you know what time it is now? You supposed me to wash my panties." Sin replied "Errrrrrr, I'm with customer. Be home soon."
Mud "Now, would you please excuse me too, time to eat my cha gou."
Sin "Tai, get the bill."
Tai "Why it is always me?"
Because you are Tai Lan Wor.

The end.